Holiday hypotheticals

Those who know me know that I'm a planner. I write a daily to-do list to ensure that everything gets done, I have longer-term lists of everything that needs doing over the next few months and then I plan those things in as much detail as I can. Holidays are no exception. I can be spontaneous (honestly!) - I enjoy just wandering and seeing where we end up, and planning as we go is one of the things I enjoy about camping around France. However, on the whole, my holidays are planned meticulously. I check flight times and prices if it involves a plane; I look for possible stops on the journey if we're going to be driving. I look at different hotels/campsites/apartments before booking and read reviews to find out more about location, cleanliness, staff, etc. I research all the things there are to do in the area, and often check out places to eat too.

The planning is actually one of the things I like about holidays. If ever I have a momentary panic about the amount I'm spending on one weekend/week/fortnight of my life, I remember that it isn't just that short amount of time - the impact of a holiday lasts far longer. In addition to the time you spend actually on holiday (still the best bit, obviously), you also get the memories afterwards, plus the lasting well-being benefits of having had some time off. Before the holiday, you get the time you spend planning and looking forward to the holiday. If I'm having a bad day, I think about all the exciting things we'll be doing on holiday. If I'm feeling stressed, I know I'll be able to forget about my worries for a while when I'm away. If it's cold, I picture myself lying on the beach in the sun. I enjoy planning what we'll do and checking out websites for attractions. I like trawling through Twitter, Instagram and travel blogs to find out more information. I check Trip Advisor religiously to read any new reviews for where we're going. I look at YouTube to see whether there are any videos of our destination, and I even scroll through Google images just for fun. Obsessive, I know (hmmm, wonder where I got my blog title from?!), but it cheers me up.

Of course, as with most things in life, my planning does occasionally have its downsides. The planning has to start before the holiday is actually booked - how else can we decide where to go, where to stay and how to get there? This means that I am initially planning hypothetical holidays... and sometimes I might get just a little bit carried away. Although sometimes I am simply researching flights or hotels for a specific holiday we're definitely going on, sometimes I have a habit of planning holidays that aren't definite - or even, on occasion, likely. I've done it many times. Sometimes it might be looking in more details at somewhere that I heard someone mention or saw on TV, for example. Sometimes we might have a bit of extra money (okay, not very often) and I'll start planning all the exotic places we could go with it. Sometimes my husband or the kids might mention a destination so I'll look up possible holidays there. Sometimes my planning is relatively sensible - starting to research possible destinations for the summer holidays, for example - and sometimes it's less so - researching places I'd love to visit and probably never have a hope of actually seeing. I get obsessed with these places (there's that word again) and bookmark them on Trip Advisor, regularly checking reviews for hotels I'll probably never visit. I can still tell you the name of the hotel in Cyprus and the one in Mexico that I was convinced we were going to stay in (but I won't, because I'll get sad again).

And it's that word 'sad' that is the downside. Hand in hand with booking any holiday - but particularly a hypothetical one - often goes disappointment. Because that holiday doesn't always happen. Maybe you haven't got as much money as you thought you had. Maybe you're the only one who wants to visit that destination. Maybe the hotel you fancied is fully booked. Maybe the dates don't fit, the price has gone up or a bad review has changed your mind. Maybe it seemed like the perfect holiday but somehow it's just not right, or maybe it was a pipe dream that was never going to happen anyway. When your plan for a holiday - or part of a holiday - doesn't reach fruition, it's hard not to feel disappointed. If you're like me, you've planned every last detail, looked forward to it and imagined yourself there... and now it's not happening. And even if you're able to mitigate that disappointment by booking another holiday - or another element of it - you often find it just doesn't match up.

It must be a year ago that we decided to go to Greece this summer, when our youngest expressed an interest in visiting after learning about the Ancient Greeks at school. We talked for a while about where to go - one of the bigger islands like Crete or Rhodes, which we'd already visited but which we knew had lots to do, or one of the smaller islands, which we'd never been to but which might have less to entertain the kids (or us). We opted for Corfu in the end - one of the bigger islands but somewhere we'd only visited once and not seen much of (due to food poisoning - but that's a story for another blog!). I started looking at hotels, both through packages and independently, and found one we all really liked the look of. It was a perfect compromise - big enough to have waterslides and a buffet restaurant but not overly big or 'British'. The reviews were good and I bookmarked it on Trip Advisor, checking regularly. The trouble was, despite having planned this holiday, we hadn't actually booked it. We were waiting to have enough money; we were waiting to get my husband's leave organised; and we just generally hadn't got around to it. So when we finally went to book the hotel, we were gutted to find that it was already booked up for the dates we could do. It was hard not to be disappointed; we had set our hearts on it and nothing else available ticked all the boxes.

Even more recently, I had the disappointment of the Sardinia holiday that won't happen. I realised that my husband and I will have been together for 25 years this May - what better excuse for a holiday than a silver anniversary celebration?! I started trawling Travelzoo and Secret Escapes for some exciting cheap deals and found a few possibilities. We found a cheap package to Hong Kong, which we were really tempted by, but we thought that was maybe a little too extravagant to justify. I started looking at easyJet for prices to various European destinations, and hit upon Sardinia. We could fly there and back for less than £100 each, and hotels seemed to be surprisingly good value. We planned four days over our anniversary, feeling chuffed that it would be both special and affordable. Then my husband went to book the time off work - and it turned out that someone else had already booked that time period and he couldn't go. Sardinia up in smoke.

Of course, you won't be surprised to learn that I deal with holiday disappointment in the same way as I deal with anything else that makes me sad - I start planning a holiday. Yes, I know - this is potentially rather counterproductive, but it usually works. In the case of Corfu, having found out that nothing was going to live up to our expectations, we realised we'd have to change our expectations instead. We decided to forget hotels and look for apartments where we could go self-catering (like all my Greek holidays of years gone by!). We found some nice apartments with a pool and near the beach, with good reviews on Trip Advisor. This time we booked it pretty quickly, to avoid further disappointment, and now I can start planning what to do and where we might like to eat out, given that we won't have a hotel restaurant (silver lining and all that!). In the case of Sardinia, we realised that no one at my husband's work had booked off May half-term, so we booked it quickly. We're now going camping in Dorset with the kids - not exactly the romantic child-free break in the sun we originally had planned, but I'm now enjoying researching Dorset instead - plus I'm sure we'll at least fit in an anniversary dinner somewhere.

The moral of today's blog? Plan away by all means, but don't invest in it too much if it's just hypothetical. And if you face disappointment? Planning a holiday always helps...!

Holiday withdrawal

I haven't blogged since September. Four months - probably a record. There are two main reasons for this. The first is work - I have been working pretty much full-time for the last few months, on top of kids, house and all the usual things that take up hours, and I just haven't found - or been able to justify - the time to sit down and write a blog entry. The second reason - and this is more depressing -  is a distinct lack of holidays to blog about.

The last time I blogged, we'd not long got back from France. Granted, it was only two weeks and not the five weeks of old, but it did inspire me to write Magic municipals. We didn't go away again until the end of October, our now-regular half-term trip to the Bitacora in Tenerife. Given that I've already blogged about it at least four times (Four star favourite, If you can't beat them..., Same old, same old and Spring Hotel Bitacora, Tenerife), I didn't really have much more to add. It's not an adventurous holiday. It's not about seeing new places or trying new things. It's about going to a familiar hotel - which we really like - and relaxing. Chilling on the beach or by the pool, eating lots and the children being entertained. To be fair, this year we did have the novelty of an amazing upgrade to a Level 8 Terrace room - that's definitely worth a few pictures but maybe not a whole blog post!

Our Level 8 Terrace - probably bigger than my house...

Some of the amazing views from our balcony

Breakfast delivered to our balcony on our last morning

We planned on a weekend visit to Bruges in December to see the Christmas markets but we left it too late - reasonably priced family rooms are few and far between on the continent, or so we've found, and there was nothing available that would accommodate all of us and still leave us enough money to actually eat. Needless to say, we didn't go, and another blogging opportunity slipped through the net.

So here I am, heading towards the end of January, not having been on holiday for nearly three months. Okay, okay, I know that's nothing for a lot of people but this time of year is the longest I ever go between holidays. And on one level I don't mind, as Christmas is the one time of year I'd prefer to be at home with family than to be on holiday (Christmas (no) holidays...). But I do start to get itchy feet around now. Christmas is over, the weather is cold, the nights are long and the best way to cheer myself up is a holiday. We'd already booked Corfu for the summer and Tenerife (again!) for October, but they're forever away. So we've now booked Center Parcs in the Netherlands for Easter and I feel a bit better. But that's still three months away. And I'm getting serious holiday withdrawal symptoms...

Clearly, this is easily fixed: I need another holiday and I need it as soon as possible. So we're currently looking at a couple of nights in London during February half-term. Money, weather and work limit how long we can go away for and how far we can go, but I'll be happy just to get away for a bit. I wish I didn't still have a month to go, but at least I can spend the next few weeks planning things to do. And I'll finally have something new to blog about!

Magical municipals

Over the last 12 years, I've stayed at an awful lot of French campsites. I'd hate to hazard a guess at how many but, given that we used to spend up to five weeks travelling from campsite to campsite, often only staying a night or two before moving on, I can guarantee the number is well into the double figures. With number comes diversity - we've stayed in a lot of different types of campsite. We've stayed in all-singing, all-dancing campsites, like Le Soleil in Argeles-sur-Mer, with 800+ pitches, a pool, kids club, restaurant and a host of other facilities. At the other end of the scale, we've also stayed in small, quiet campsites, such as Les Portes du Trièves near Grenoble, where the toilet/washing block and reception are the only facilities. Of course, we've also stayed at lots somewhere in between, and the truth is that we like all types. They all serve a purpose - sometimes it's good to have somewhere quiet, where you're guaranteed to get a pitch and a good night's sleep. Sometimes it's nice to stay somewhere buzzy, where you can swim or eat out without leaving the campsite and the kids are always entertained.

The swimming pool at Le Soleil in the south of France

With diversity in size and facilities, of course, also comes diversity in price - and we have found a huge range of prices throughout our campsite experiences. On the whole, we've found camping to be cheaper in France than in the UK, paying over 50 euros for some of the bigger campsites but as little as 10 euros in some of the smaller ones. The cheapest campsites, we've discovered, tend to be municipals. For those who have never come across these before, municipal campsites are owned by the local authority and you can find them in most towns and large villages. They tend to be on the outskirts, but it is usually walkable to the town/village and thus to any facilities you may need. The campsites themselves tend to be low on facilities, as you would expect for a low price: you should find decent sanitary and washing up facilities, probably a couple of washing machines and maybe a children's playground - and that's probably it. However, you will often find that you are given free or reduced access to the local swimming pool and occasionally other local facilities (we've been offered free mini-golf and reduced cinema tickets in the past). Unless you have a desperate need for bells and whistles on site, municipal campsites make the perfect base for exploring France. You're likely to find one near most major sites and attractions, and you can usually walk into the town for dinner if you don't fancy campsite cooking.

Municipal campsite in Autun

Free municipal swimming pool in La Roche-Chalais

Municipal campsite in Gignac

Having just said that municipal campsites are low on facilities, there are exceptions. We had stayed at La Hallerais, just outside Dinan in Brittany, at least three times before we realised it was a municipal campsite. It has a small heated pool, tennis courts, a playground, table tennis and mini-golf, all free of charge. It also has a restaurant, a games room and a small shop, plus a large, well-staffed reception area. We returned (and still do) for several reasons: we really like the location, with its beautiful riverside walk into Dinan; it has good facilities and plenty to keep the children occupied; and the toilets and showers are some of the biggest and cleanest we've come across! But another huge draw has always been the price: a pitch for a tent and a family of four is just over 20 euros per night - and that's including all the facilities mentioned above! We had always wondered why it was so cheap compared to other similar campsites, until all was explained when we noticed the word 'municipal' on its website. So while you won't get anything on the Eurocamp level at a municipal campsite (or at a Eurocamp price!), there are bigger, more facilitied (is that a word?!) municipals out there if you look, so don't assume they're only for those who like a basic campsite!

One of our many pitches at La Hallerais over the years

Kids' swimming pool at La Hallerais

Wildflowers at La Hallerais

The riverside path from the campsite into Dinan

Even if you're not keen on spending the night under canvas, you don't have to rule out municipal campsites. Just like Eurocamp, municipal campsites do mobile homes too - and at a fraction of the cost! As a general rule, you can expect your mobile home to have a fully equipped kitchen, with a fridge, hobs and microwave (but no oven or dishwasher - sorry!), a toilet and shower, indoor and outdoor table and seating, and separate bedrooms for you and the kids (if travelling with a family). They cover all your needs - you have all the facilities you need in the home itself, plus you get to use the campsite facilities too - laundry, playground and whatever else you need. Hey, you can even use the campsite toilets and showers if yours are being used! You'll need to bring your own towels and sheets (although they can often be provided at a cost) but otherwise you have everything you need right there. It's drier than a tent, more private than a hostel and cheaper than AirBnB - what's not to love?! Just as an example, we recently spent a week in a mobile home in a municipal campsite at La Roche-Chalais in the Dordogne - it cost 190 euros for the four of us. A Eurocamp mobile home in the Dordogne over the same period would normally cost around £1,000. Yes, you'd get more facilities - but are they really worth £800 a week?! As with the price of camping, you can expect to pay more for a mobile home in those campsites with more facilities or in particularly desirable locations. Either way, it's an extremely cheap way to holiday if you don't like tents!

Our mobile home in the Dordogne

A few final tips: firstly, the Michelin guide to camping in France is particularly helpful for finding campsites, municipal or not. Secondly, you won't always find a website - or at least, not a very good one! - for municipal campsites; be prepared to do a bit of digging, emailing or even phoning. Thirdly, as municipal campsites don't tend to be frequented much by British tourists, the staff often speak no or limited English. If you speak a little French, it does come in very handy - if not, make Google Translate your friend! Finally, if travelling with children during the summer holidays, the middle to end of August is the cheapest time to go. What's classified as high season varies in France, but the middle of August onwards is apparently mid-season in the Dordogne, with Brittany following suit a week later - travelling at the beginning of August would have meant paying high-season prices, so it's a potential saving of £100-200 a week to travel a bit later!

Sadly, I've not come across municipal campsites anywhere other than France, although I hear that Portugal has a similar system. But if you fancy a cheap French adventure, give them a go - after all, money saved on your accommodation means more money for eating, days out and, of course, your next holiday!

Traveller or tourist?

Earlier this year, I joined Twitter and discovered a whole community of travel bloggers. It's great - they're supportive of each other, they share tips, advice and photos, they have some great discussions and they inspire me to go and visit even more places than I wanted to before. But the thing is, I'm not sure I quite fit in. These are travellers - they go to far-flung places, off the beaten track, often for months at a time, and they stay in hostels with all their belongings carried round in a backpack. Even those with full-time jobs, who can't practically spend six months exploring Asia, seem to disappear to places I've never heard of every other weekend. Before joining Twitter, I'd considered myself relatively well travelled. It's a long-standing joke among those who know me that I'm always on holiday. But suddenly, in comparison to all these 'proper' travellers, I've realised I'm small fry. They have three months backpacking in Tanzania, and I'm getting excited for my week in a hotel in Tenerife.

So what sets me apart from the real travellers? Well, for starters, I'm struggling to think of any exotic or unusual destinations I've visited. I've never set foot in South America, and my North America experience consists of Florida and Jamaica - so far, so mainstream. My African experience so far is just an organised mini-cruise to Egypt from Cyprus. My visits to Asia consist of Turkey (geographically), Hong Kong and a few hours in Singapore airport (which, believe me, I counted as having visited Asia before I'd done the others!). Hong Kong was pretty adventurous for me - but, as anyone who's been there knows, its British influence is still highly visible. I've been to Australia - far-flung but not unusual. As for Europe, I've been to a fair few countries, but none of the less obvious ones. Spain, Greece, Italy? Check. Albania, Latvia, Slovenia? Er, no.

The beach in Jamaica - not as deserted as it looks in the picture!

Up Victoria Peak in Hong Kong

I've also never stayed in a hostel in my life. I have no particular need for five star hotels (although I wouldn't complain!) but the thought of sleeping in a room with strangers holds no appeal whatsoever. I also have no desire to share a bathroom with other people (although I don't mind when camping - strange, eh?). We're not exactly spontaneous either. We stayed for five weeks in Australia, in eleven different locations - and each hotel/apartment/motel/mobile home (I do at least manage variety) was booked in advance, and only after thorough research on Trip Advisor. My holidays are generally organised long in advance of when we actually go (over a year ahead is not unusual) - there's no 'Shall we go to XXX next weekend?' or going to the airport and jumping on the first plane available (although I've ALWAYS wanted to do that!). Another thing that sets me apart from 'travellers' is the amount of time I spend away. Back when my husband was still teaching and I had less work, we'd spend almost the entire six-week summer holiday travelling around France (or, once, Australia). Now, we don't manage more than a fortnight at a time, which isn't really long enough to travel around or fully explore new places - and if you try, it's exhausting.

View from our apartment in Scarborough near Perth

Balcony in our hotel room in Alice Springs

View from our motel in Townsville

Holiday park in Airlie Beach

The house where we stayed in Sydney

One of the Instagram accounts I follow recently posed the question 'Are you a traveller or a tourist?' I realised I wasn't sure. Do I consider myself a traveller? No. Would I like to be? Maybe. So what's stopping me?

Well, one major factor is my children. I love taking them on holiday and helping them to explore the world, but having them does affect the sort of holidays we choose. Safety and comfort are naturally more of a concern when you travel with children. I'm less keen to visit anywhere that could be considered unsafe or where poverty is a problem. I'm less keen to visit anywhere where the culture is vastly different, and I find myself choosing to visit Westernised destinations. I want to have the accommodation booked in advance - I don't want to risk not having anywhere to stay for the night when I'm with the kids. The type of accommodation is also an issue - are there enough beds for the kids to sleep in our room? Are children welcome? Are there any kids' facilities? These things need researching. Spontaneity isn't easy with children - if I'm spending out on a holiday, I need to know it's going to tick all the boxes, and I don't want to leave anything to chance. Safety and practicalities aside, will there be enough at the destination to entertain and occupy the kids? I never let a holiday revolve around the children but it absolutely has to involve a compromise. They will happily (well, sometimes) follow us around a museum or castle, wander around a pretty village or go for a five-mile hike. But these more 'adult' activities need to be interspersed with things that are more family-orientated - is there a theme park? Can we go tree-trekking or play crazy golf? Can we at least stop for half an hour while they play in a playground? Happy kids equals happy parents!

Tree-trekking

More kids' entertainment - note the inflatables in the background too...

Another issue, unsurprisingly - and not unconnected to children - is money. Holidays cost money. Travelling costs money. And however much you shop around for cheap accommodation and travel hacks, the further you travel, the more your flights cost. Much as I might like to visit Sri Lanka or Senegal, Spain is a lot closer and a lot cheaper. Travel also costs more with children - if you're lucky, you can find hotels with family rooms, but they usually cost more, and it doesn't exactly aid spontaneity. As for flights, it doesn't matter how old the child is - if they take up a seat, they cost the full price. It's fair enough, but it doesn't make travel cheap. Taking two kids basically doubles the cost of your holiday. This is all not to mention school holiday prices either: if you keep your kids in school and only go away during school holidays, be prepared for a massive hike in prices - which, again, limits where you can go. Many a time we have gone away in October half term simply to wherever we can afford, rather than somewhere we'd specifically like to go - and this means that we're more likely to end up in the 'typical' resorts like the Spanish costas. And still on the subject of money, to pay for holidays, you have to work - and having a job means you are limited to how much time you can take off (both altogether in a year and at any one time). I'm self-employed, so I have a little more flexibility - but then I don't get paid for my holidays, so I too can't afford to go away too often or for too long, as I'm losing the opportunity to actually pay for those holidays!

Of course, I could always solve money and work problems by becoming a digital nomad. What's one of these, you ask. Well, as far as I can tell, it appears to be someone who travels around and works remotely. If you follow any travel accounts on Instagram, you're likely to have been inundated with adverts and DMs about how you too could follow their example and become a digital nomad (just pay $10 for an exclusive guide on how to do so). You too could live The Life they do. You too could give it all up and live the dream - the dream being, as far as I can tell, living in a variety of hotels and spending your days blogging about how to fund the hotels (or charging $10 to tell other people how to live in a variety of hotels). Firstly, I suspect it's not as easy as all that. Secondly, do you know what? I wouldn't want to. Some people may be very happy spending their entire lives travelling, without a base, but I'm not one of them. Much as I like my holidays, I also like coming home. I like my house and I like where I live. I like my job (most of the time). I like meeting up with my friends and I like going to our weekly quiz night. I like seeing family and watching my children form that bond with them. I like curling up on the sofa watching telly and I like sleeping in my own bed. I like my routine and I like the familiarity. I also like the novelty of escaping it to go on holiday - I suspect much of the excitement of travel would start to fade if I was doing it all the time.

So I guess I'm not really a traveller. But am I just a typical tourist? I like to think not. For a start, I go on holiday every opportunity I get - every school holiday if possible, with the odd weekend break thrown in. Money and practicality dictates that it may be just a night in a London hotel or camping in the next county, but I do go away more than most people I know. I also love to see new places; if I go on holiday, I don't want to spend the time trapped in the hotel - I want to get out and see what the area has to offer. I love going to all the obvious tourist sites, but I also love exploring and finding places that the average tourist doesn't know about. Even on a package holiday, we hire a car and go and explore. Some of my favourite holiday moments have been exploring troglodyte caves in Menorca and ancient Greek ruins in Turkey without another soul around. I also like to integrate a little - I want to try the local food and attempt the local language, and I certainly don't want to stay in a hotel where all the clientele are British.

Priene in Turkey all to ourselves

Priene

Exploring the necropolis at Calas Covas in Menorca

Calas Covas

I'm not reliant on a tour operator for holidays either - although we have done package deals, I usually prefer to organise my own holidays and book direct. I don't mind where I stay - luxury hotel, tent, apartment, wherever (but not hostel!). I like all kinds of holidays too - past holidays have included a city break in a budget hotel; all-inclusive in the Caribbean; Butlins; a walking holiday in the Cotswolds, staying in B&Bs; a family hotel in Benidorm; and, of course, camping in France. This is one example of when we were spontaneous - when we had the time, we would drive around France (and Spain, Andorra, Luxembourg and Belgium on one holiday) with a tent, staying for a couple of nights before moving on. We didn't book anything, we didn't plan ahead very much and we saw beach, mountains, countryside and cities all in the one holiday. It was brilliant (but I was also quite glad to come home!).

Prague, many years ago!

Guess where!

Early morning view from our hotel room in Jamaica

Benidorm, of course

Our tent, somewhere in France

This all sounds like I'm saying it's a bad thing to be a 'tourist' - and of course it's not. There's no right or wrong way to travel - and I'm no holiday snob. In five weeks' time I'll be in a family hotel in Tenerife, spending most of my time by the pool or on the beach. Some people prefer one type of holiday; others like to change it up. Some people like the safety net of a package deal; others prefer to organise things themselves. Some people like to plan in advance; others are more spur of the moment. Some people like luxury on holiday; others are happy to rough it. Me? I'm somewhere in between. And that's okay. I don't have to pigeonhole myself as any one thing. I don't have to have visited 73 countries or trekked the length of the Great Wall of China to have something to offer. I have my own niche - I'm a 40-something, self-employed mother of two, who loves to go on all sorts of holidays whenever she gets the chance, and who blogs about it occasionally when she gets a break in work. I may have more in common with other family travellers or part-time workers, but that doesn't mean I can't share tips with the 20-something backpacker, the retired couple on a round-the-world cruise or the full-time travel blogger. I'm not a traveller and I'm not a tourist - I'm just a holiday obsessive and proud of it!

My view in a few weeks...

And if you fancy joining me and the rest of the travel community (if you haven't already), give me a follow on Twitter or Instagram!

Overnight at the Treehouse Hotel, Port Lympne Hotel and Reserve

I have somewhat mixed feelings about animals in captivity. I am an animal lover so, while I love the opportunity to see animals up close, it goes without saying that I abhor seeing animals kept in cramped or cruel conditions. I am more torn in situations where they are kept in large enclosures with plenty of space and stimulation - a lot is said about how animals are better off in the wild, but who's to say they wouldn't prefer living somewhere safe, with plenty of food, shelter and medical attention if necessary, and without the threat of predators or poachers? Ethical dilemmas aside, Port Lympne Reserve in Kent, along with its sister park Howletts, is not your average 'zoo'. While it offers plenty for the paying visitor, its purpose is not to provide entertainment - rather, it focuses on conservation, with the ultimate aim of releasing animals back into the wild. Working in conjunction with the animal conservation charity the Aspinall Foundation, their 'mission is to halt the extinction of rare and endangered species and return them to the wild where possible'. You can read more on their website.

Although as a local girl I have visited both Port Lympne and Howletts many times over the years, this year we decided to splash out and go for one of the overnight packages that Port Lympne have started offering over recent years. The reason was for my mum's 70th birthday - my sister and I decided to treat her as she's mad about animals. I will preface this whole post by saying that, unless you have lots of money to spare, you really need a good reason or a special celebration to book one of the Port Lympne short breaks. I won't detail prices, as my mum might read this, but suffice to say they are not cheap! They are, however, pretty special and make for a very unique night or few days away. Port Lympne offer a range of different types (and prices) of accommodation. We chose the Treehouse Hotel, but if you visit the website you can find more details on the other types of accommodation available.

What was the accommodation like?

We opted for the Treehouse Hotel because we figured it was the best option for our group of three (and couldn't really imagine my mum glamping!), but it would also work particularly well for families. Although called a 'hotel', the Treehouse Hotel actually consists of several individual self-catering units, each accessed up a steep flight of stairs (although there is also an accessible option). The units comprise a twin bedroom, a double bedroom, a bathroom, an open-plan kitchen and lounge, and a large balcony, with views over a rhino and cheetah enclosure and the Hythe bay. The bedrooms were very comfortable, with robes and slippers included, and the swish bathroom - with bath and integral shower - included a selection of Bamford toiletries.

Double bedroom

Twin bedroom

Twin bedroom

Bathroom

The lounge had air conditioning, several comfy sofas and a huge TV, and the kitchen was well stocked with plenty of crockery and cutlery, a dishwasher, oven, toaster and Nespresso machine. There was milk in the fridge and a selection of hot drinks, all complimentary - there was also a basket of goodies you could pay for, although they were appropriately priced for their captive consumers, and you would be much better advised to bring your own snacks.

Lounge

Dining table

Kitchen

The balcony was huge, with a large table and chairs, plus a comfy sofa. The only downside was that we had a downpour shortly before checking into the hotel - and with no canopy over the furniture, the cushions on the sofa and the chairs were completely soaked, rendering them unusable.

Dining table on the balcony

View from the balcony

View from the balcony

Overall, the accommodation was very comfortable and felt luxurious - our only real complaint (apart from the rain) was that we didn't have enough time in it to fully enjoy it!

What's included?

It goes without saying that your park entrance, from opening time on the day you arrive until closing time on the day you leave, is included in the cost. Entrance to Howletts, around half an hour's drive away, is also included - although if you are only staying for one night, like we were, you won't be able to fit this in without missing out on some of Port Lympne. If you choose to book an animal enounter (more on this below), you get a discount on the cost equalling the price of the entry fee. If you are staying at the Treehouse Hotel, there is a clubhouse next to the rhino encounter, where you receive a free welcome drink and can toast marshmallows over the fire. It has a bar and I believe that it is open into the evening, if you want to relax there with a drink instead of in your treehouse, but I think this depends on the day and season (it seemed to close quite early when were there). One of the best things about staying is the use of a golf buggy - quite apart from being good fun to drive (if rather difficult to get used to - who knew it was easier to drive a car?!), it is also invaluable in getting around the park, which is huge and very hilly.

My mum and sister by our golf buggy

Another advantage to booking an overnight stay is that you get exclusive access to Port Lympne after the day visitors have gone home (and before they arrive the next day). Not only is it quite nice having the zoo to yourselves (well, apart from the other overnighters zipping around on their golf buggies), but you also get to see some of the animals who only tend to come out at night or at quieter/cooler times.

Where can you eat?

There are a number of eating places in Port Lympne, at varying prices. At lunchtime on the first day, we ate at a cafe that I can't find a name for, near Base Camp (where you check in on arrival and where you queue for the safari truck - more below). It has a variety of pasties, ready-made sandwiches, cakes, snacks and drinks and is an easy lunch option. On the second day, we hoped to have lunch in the Pinewood Cafe near the entrance, where they also do a variety of hot lunches - something with pulled pork jumped out - but we were in the wrong part of the park. They had a small 'kiosk' near Babydoll's (more later) also selling hot food, but sadly this was closed while we were there. We ended up grabbing a sandwich at the kiosk near the meerkats, which was disappointing if I'm honest, but it was late and it was literally the last one left. Luckily, the gelato from the ice cream van next door made up for it! The aforementioned Babydoll's was our choice for dinner. Named after the last surviving original Howlett's gorillas, it's Italian themed and serves a mix of pasta and pizzas. There wasn't a huge choice but everything we ate was delicious. You can eat outside if the weather's good, although we chose to eat indoors - it was relatively quiet when we were there, although I'd imagine it's a different story at peak times. There were plenty of children there and the prices were mid-range, so this would be a good choice for dinner if you were there on a family trip.

Outside Babydoll's

The other dinner choices were the Pinewood Cafe - reasonably priced but I would suspect that it lacks the ambience you'd want for an evening meal - and the restaurant inside the Port Lympne Hotel itself, the original Grade 2 listed mansion house. The Port Lympne Hotel also serves up afternoon tea; unfortunately, the prices for both this and the evening meals were a little over our budget after paying for the stay in the first place!

What animals will you see?

There are a whole host of animals at Port Lympne, although that doesn't necessarily mean you'll see all of them! The nature of the park means that the enclosures are generally very large, with lots of places for animals to hide away - so if they don't want to show themselves, they won't! As I mentioned earlier, accessing the park in the evening or early morning can increase your chances of seeing some of the harder-to-spot animals - for example, there was no sign of the wolves during the day but in the evening they were out playing (and we heard them howling from our balcony later on!). There are plenty of primates - lemurs, langurs, gibbons, drills, howler monkeys and, my personal favourite, gorillas. These are usually the highlight of my trip to Port Lympne or Howletts but most of them sadly seemed to be hiding this time.

There are lots of cats - lions, tigers, cheetahs and smaller cats such as the fishing cat or the Scottish wildcat. You can also expect to see rhinos, meerkats, tapirs, red pandas and a whole host of other animals while you wander round the park (or scoot around in your golf buggy).

In addition to those animals you can see independently, all visitors to the park get to go on a safari truck to see some more animals in as natural a habitat as possible - and believe me, there were plenty of moments on the safari when you could quite believe you were on the plains of Africa. The safari ride takes around an hour, with the guide providing information as you go and stopping to get a better look at those animals that are nearby - or to wait for a rhino to get out of the way! As well as rhinos, you can expect to see giraffes (they have recently had several babies born), zebras, camels, water buffalo, ostriches and more species of deer and antelope than I have a hope of recalling. I think the procedure for booking onto the safari varies depending on the time of year - this time, we were able to book a convenient time and were given a ticket to get on, but on my previous visit (during the school holidays), we simply had to queue (for some time) for the next available truck.

What else is there to see?

Slightly incongruously, there is also a fairly newly opened Dinosaur Forest in Port Lympne - this is a (long) walk along a wooded track filled with life-sized models of dinosaurs, along with corresponding information. Along with the obvious T-Rex, stegosaurus, triceratops and so on, there are also plenty of lesser-known (and rather unusual looking) specimens. It's great fun for children, but still interesting for adults.

It is also well worth a wander around the grounds of the mansion house (now the Port Lympne Hotel). Beautifully landscaped, expect to see ponds, a maze, statues, steps with a view and lots of colourful flowers. If there's no wedding going on, you can also have a wander through the mansion house itself. From the amazing murals on the walls to the picturesque Moroccan courtyard, you can see why it's a popular wedding venue.

Can I get up close to the animals?

As mentioned previously, the animals are free to come and go as they please within their enclosures, so how close you get depends on whether they want to show themselves! However, Port Lympne do offer a number of experiences to allow you to get a more 'personal' view of the animals. As well as smaller and one-to-one safaris, you can also book animal encounters with select animals (at a price similarly eye-watering to the hotel but, again, well worth it if you like animals). My mum chose to have a tapir encounter in the hope that it might be more 'hands-on' than some of the other encounters (I certainly had no desire to get up close and personal with the big cats!). The encounters are usually in small groups but we were lucky that it was just the three of us. We got to spend time with the keeper behind the scenes in the tapir house, learning all about tapirs and getting very close indeed. Turns out tapirs love having their tummies rubbed, and they also have quite a liking for sweat, given how much my mum was licked! (I should probably add here that it was a very hot day!) We got to meet Kingut, who, at 40, is the world's oldest  Malayan tapir - apparently, he can get quite over-excited and nip sometimes, but we caught him in a lazy mood, where he wanted nothing more than to lie on his side while we rubbed his tummy. For anyone concerned that the encounter is intrusive for the tapirs, I will say that it was very evident that the animals also enjoyed and benefited from the human contact. The keeper was very knowledgeable and had clearly built up relationships with the tapirs, and I have no doubt that all encounters are handled very sensitively and put the needs of the animals as paramount. While I can only speak for the tapir experience, it really was an amazing opportunity to get face to face with an animal you would never expect to encounter!

You taste nice!

Kingut - the oldest Malayan tapir in the world!

Tapirs love a tummy rub!

Is there anything else I need to know?

Firstly, as mentioned above, the park is very large and full of steep hills. Wear comfy shoes because you'll be doing a lot of walking!

Although there are plenty of places to eat, you're quite welcome to bring your own food for a picnic. The Treehouse Hotel is set up for self-catering, so you can bring your own food to cook if you so wish. We brought croissants, bread, jam and cereal so that we could have breakfast on our balcony (and save ourselves the cost of breakfast in one of the restaurants!).

Breakfast with a view

Who needs a selfie stick when you have a reflection in a window?!

Although you can get to the park as soon as it opens (9.30 am), you can't check in to the treehouse until 3.00 pm (this could be an issue if you have any food that needs refrigeration!). There is a centrally positioned car park reserved for hotel guests, so you can leave your stuff in the car until you check in. You're taken to the clubhouse along with your luggage in a little truck (the treehouses aren't accessible on foot), where you receive your golf buggy (along with instructions on how to drive it) and your key. You have to check out at 11.00 am the morning you leave, although you get to keep the golf buggy until 1.00 pm. You can either take your luggage back to the car in the golf buggy or the staff will transport it for you in a truck. You can still stay at the park until closing time - 6.30 pm in summer and 5.30 pm in winter.