Traveller or tourist?

Earlier this year, I joined Twitter and discovered a whole community of travel bloggers. It's great - they're supportive of each other, they share tips, advice and photos, they have some great discussions and they inspire me to go and visit even more places than I wanted to before. But the thing is, I'm not sure I quite fit in. These are travellers - they go to far-flung places, off the beaten track, often for months at a time, and they stay in hostels with all their belongings carried round in a backpack. Even those with full-time jobs, who can't practically spend six months exploring Asia, seem to disappear to places I've never heard of every other weekend. Before joining Twitter, I'd considered myself relatively well travelled. It's a long-standing joke among those who know me that I'm always on holiday. But suddenly, in comparison to all these 'proper' travellers, I've realised I'm small fry. They have three months backpacking in Tanzania, and I'm getting excited for my week in a hotel in Tenerife.

So what sets me apart from the real travellers? Well, for starters, I'm struggling to think of any exotic or unusual destinations I've visited. I've never set foot in South America, and my North America experience consists of Florida and Jamaica - so far, so mainstream. My African experience so far is just an organised mini-cruise to Egypt from Cyprus. My visits to Asia consist of Turkey (geographically), Hong Kong and a few hours in Singapore airport (which, believe me, I counted as having visited Asia before I'd done the others!). Hong Kong was pretty adventurous for me - but, as anyone who's been there knows, its British influence is still highly visible. I've been to Australia - far-flung but not unusual. As for Europe, I've been to a fair few countries, but none of the less obvious ones. Spain, Greece, Italy? Check. Albania, Latvia, Slovenia? Er, no.

The beach in Jamaica - not as deserted as it looks in the picture!

Up Victoria Peak in Hong Kong

I've also never stayed in a hostel in my life. I have no particular need for five star hotels (although I wouldn't complain!) but the thought of sleeping in a room with strangers holds no appeal whatsoever. I also have no desire to share a bathroom with other people (although I don't mind when camping - strange, eh?). We're not exactly spontaneous either. We stayed for five weeks in Australia, in eleven different locations - and each hotel/apartment/motel/mobile home (I do at least manage variety) was booked in advance, and only after thorough research on Trip Advisor. My holidays are generally organised long in advance of when we actually go (over a year ahead is not unusual) - there's no 'Shall we go to XXX next weekend?' or going to the airport and jumping on the first plane available (although I've ALWAYS wanted to do that!). Another thing that sets me apart from 'travellers' is the amount of time I spend away. Back when my husband was still teaching and I had less work, we'd spend almost the entire six-week summer holiday travelling around France (or, once, Australia). Now, we don't manage more than a fortnight at a time, which isn't really long enough to travel around or fully explore new places - and if you try, it's exhausting.

View from our apartment in Scarborough near Perth

Balcony in our hotel room in Alice Springs

View from our motel in Townsville

Holiday park in Airlie Beach

The house where we stayed in Sydney

One of the Instagram accounts I follow recently posed the question 'Are you a traveller or a tourist?' I realised I wasn't sure. Do I consider myself a traveller? No. Would I like to be? Maybe. So what's stopping me?

Well, one major factor is my children. I love taking them on holiday and helping them to explore the world, but having them does affect the sort of holidays we choose. Safety and comfort are naturally more of a concern when you travel with children. I'm less keen to visit anywhere that could be considered unsafe or where poverty is a problem. I'm less keen to visit anywhere where the culture is vastly different, and I find myself choosing to visit Westernised destinations. I want to have the accommodation booked in advance - I don't want to risk not having anywhere to stay for the night when I'm with the kids. The type of accommodation is also an issue - are there enough beds for the kids to sleep in our room? Are children welcome? Are there any kids' facilities? These things need researching. Spontaneity isn't easy with children - if I'm spending out on a holiday, I need to know it's going to tick all the boxes, and I don't want to leave anything to chance. Safety and practicalities aside, will there be enough at the destination to entertain and occupy the kids? I never let a holiday revolve around the children but it absolutely has to involve a compromise. They will happily (well, sometimes) follow us around a museum or castle, wander around a pretty village or go for a five-mile hike. But these more 'adult' activities need to be interspersed with things that are more family-orientated - is there a theme park? Can we go tree-trekking or play crazy golf? Can we at least stop for half an hour while they play in a playground? Happy kids equals happy parents!

Tree-trekking

More kids' entertainment - note the inflatables in the background too...

Another issue, unsurprisingly - and not unconnected to children - is money. Holidays cost money. Travelling costs money. And however much you shop around for cheap accommodation and travel hacks, the further you travel, the more your flights cost. Much as I might like to visit Sri Lanka or Senegal, Spain is a lot closer and a lot cheaper. Travel also costs more with children - if you're lucky, you can find hotels with family rooms, but they usually cost more, and it doesn't exactly aid spontaneity. As for flights, it doesn't matter how old the child is - if they take up a seat, they cost the full price. It's fair enough, but it doesn't make travel cheap. Taking two kids basically doubles the cost of your holiday. This is all not to mention school holiday prices either: if you keep your kids in school and only go away during school holidays, be prepared for a massive hike in prices - which, again, limits where you can go. Many a time we have gone away in October half term simply to wherever we can afford, rather than somewhere we'd specifically like to go - and this means that we're more likely to end up in the 'typical' resorts like the Spanish costas. And still on the subject of money, to pay for holidays, you have to work - and having a job means you are limited to how much time you can take off (both altogether in a year and at any one time). I'm self-employed, so I have a little more flexibility - but then I don't get paid for my holidays, so I too can't afford to go away too often or for too long, as I'm losing the opportunity to actually pay for those holidays!

Of course, I could always solve money and work problems by becoming a digital nomad. What's one of these, you ask. Well, as far as I can tell, it appears to be someone who travels around and works remotely. If you follow any travel accounts on Instagram, you're likely to have been inundated with adverts and DMs about how you too could follow their example and become a digital nomad (just pay $10 for an exclusive guide on how to do so). You too could live The Life they do. You too could give it all up and live the dream - the dream being, as far as I can tell, living in a variety of hotels and spending your days blogging about how to fund the hotels (or charging $10 to tell other people how to live in a variety of hotels). Firstly, I suspect it's not as easy as all that. Secondly, do you know what? I wouldn't want to. Some people may be very happy spending their entire lives travelling, without a base, but I'm not one of them. Much as I like my holidays, I also like coming home. I like my house and I like where I live. I like my job (most of the time). I like meeting up with my friends and I like going to our weekly quiz night. I like seeing family and watching my children form that bond with them. I like curling up on the sofa watching telly and I like sleeping in my own bed. I like my routine and I like the familiarity. I also like the novelty of escaping it to go on holiday - I suspect much of the excitement of travel would start to fade if I was doing it all the time.

So I guess I'm not really a traveller. But am I just a typical tourist? I like to think not. For a start, I go on holiday every opportunity I get - every school holiday if possible, with the odd weekend break thrown in. Money and practicality dictates that it may be just a night in a London hotel or camping in the next county, but I do go away more than most people I know. I also love to see new places; if I go on holiday, I don't want to spend the time trapped in the hotel - I want to get out and see what the area has to offer. I love going to all the obvious tourist sites, but I also love exploring and finding places that the average tourist doesn't know about. Even on a package holiday, we hire a car and go and explore. Some of my favourite holiday moments have been exploring troglodyte caves in Menorca and ancient Greek ruins in Turkey without another soul around. I also like to integrate a little - I want to try the local food and attempt the local language, and I certainly don't want to stay in a hotel where all the clientele are British.

Priene in Turkey all to ourselves

Priene

Exploring the necropolis at Calas Covas in Menorca

Calas Covas

I'm not reliant on a tour operator for holidays either - although we have done package deals, I usually prefer to organise my own holidays and book direct. I don't mind where I stay - luxury hotel, tent, apartment, wherever (but not hostel!). I like all kinds of holidays too - past holidays have included a city break in a budget hotel; all-inclusive in the Caribbean; Butlins; a walking holiday in the Cotswolds, staying in B&Bs; a family hotel in Benidorm; and, of course, camping in France. This is one example of when we were spontaneous - when we had the time, we would drive around France (and Spain, Andorra, Luxembourg and Belgium on one holiday) with a tent, staying for a couple of nights before moving on. We didn't book anything, we didn't plan ahead very much and we saw beach, mountains, countryside and cities all in the one holiday. It was brilliant (but I was also quite glad to come home!).

Prague, many years ago!

Guess where!

Early morning view from our hotel room in Jamaica

Benidorm, of course

Our tent, somewhere in France

This all sounds like I'm saying it's a bad thing to be a 'tourist' - and of course it's not. There's no right or wrong way to travel - and I'm no holiday snob. In five weeks' time I'll be in a family hotel in Tenerife, spending most of my time by the pool or on the beach. Some people prefer one type of holiday; others like to change it up. Some people like the safety net of a package deal; others prefer to organise things themselves. Some people like to plan in advance; others are more spur of the moment. Some people like luxury on holiday; others are happy to rough it. Me? I'm somewhere in between. And that's okay. I don't have to pigeonhole myself as any one thing. I don't have to have visited 73 countries or trekked the length of the Great Wall of China to have something to offer. I have my own niche - I'm a 40-something, self-employed mother of two, who loves to go on all sorts of holidays whenever she gets the chance, and who blogs about it occasionally when she gets a break in work. I may have more in common with other family travellers or part-time workers, but that doesn't mean I can't share tips with the 20-something backpacker, the retired couple on a round-the-world cruise or the full-time travel blogger. I'm not a traveller and I'm not a tourist - I'm just a holiday obsessive and proud of it!

My view in a few weeks...

And if you fancy joining me and the rest of the travel community (if you haven't already), give me a follow on Twitter or Instagram!